Feeling useless.
So yesterday I thought I had finally gotten over the negative effects of the pill. Boy - was I wrong. 2pm came around - I felt AWEFUL. It stayed throughout the afternoon... into the evening. FUN TIMES.
By 9pm I was ready to scream. Loud. I feel horrible in my own skin, like i'm not myself one bit. I hate it. I went to bed at 9 - hating myself because I have a whole lot of work to catch up on - and I just cannot. I didn't touch ONE bit of work last night. I couldn't. I went to read in bed.... I was sound asleep by 10pm. I prayed that I'd get up feeling fine - i mean come on - 9 hours of sleep?? Um... not so much. Took everything I had to get out of bed this morning - and STILL i felt sick.
I'm going to be the worse pregnant woman ever. Actually - if I was pregnant right now, it would be different. for one, there would be a light at the end of the tunnel. There kind of is right now - but the frustrations mostly come from the fact that most women I know are or have been on the pill... and nobody reacts this badly to it :( Second point - i'd probably be exhausted... which would make me feel LESS bad for going to be early. last night I didn't go to bed cause i couldn't stay up anymore - i went to bed cause i was sick, but not horribly sick, just sick enough not to be able to concentrate on my work. not that i want to be MORE sick, but this in between crap is bugging me.
On a positive note (i'm so twisted) we "have" to skip one of the work parties we didn't even want to go to... we have to head to montreal that afternoon. Oh darn...!! NOT that I want to go to Mtrl that afternoon - especially since it means spending the night, most likely at a hotel... but i don't want to go to the party - and this is the EASY way out.
speaking of clinic in montreal... i'm trying to get a hold of them - i need to schedule a second appointment for the 16th to pick back up donor sperm. I called monday morning - they called me back tuesday. ARH. monday is my day AT HOME. Now i have to call from work. I go in the 'secure phone booth' yesterday -- and could hear somebody coughing - and I figured if I can hear them - they can hear me :( and frankly - i didn't want somebody to hear me say we need to schedule an appointment to pick donor sperm...! [interupted by the clinic's phone call - how weird is that?] turns out they missed the hep C testing - so they asked if i could do it next time i come in... and then she said she'd try to find a slot for me on the 16th, and she's calling me back on that... sooooooo she asked me, i didn't have to say the words, thank goodness, i'm sitting in my open area office!!!
By 9pm I was ready to scream. Loud. I feel horrible in my own skin, like i'm not myself one bit. I hate it. I went to bed at 9 - hating myself because I have a whole lot of work to catch up on - and I just cannot. I didn't touch ONE bit of work last night. I couldn't. I went to read in bed.... I was sound asleep by 10pm. I prayed that I'd get up feeling fine - i mean come on - 9 hours of sleep?? Um... not so much. Took everything I had to get out of bed this morning - and STILL i felt sick.
I'm going to be the worse pregnant woman ever. Actually - if I was pregnant right now, it would be different. for one, there would be a light at the end of the tunnel. There kind of is right now - but the frustrations mostly come from the fact that most women I know are or have been on the pill... and nobody reacts this badly to it :( Second point - i'd probably be exhausted... which would make me feel LESS bad for going to be early. last night I didn't go to bed cause i couldn't stay up anymore - i went to bed cause i was sick, but not horribly sick, just sick enough not to be able to concentrate on my work. not that i want to be MORE sick, but this in between crap is bugging me.
On a positive note (i'm so twisted) we "have" to skip one of the work parties we didn't even want to go to... we have to head to montreal that afternoon. Oh darn...!! NOT that I want to go to Mtrl that afternoon - especially since it means spending the night, most likely at a hotel... but i don't want to go to the party - and this is the EASY way out.
speaking of clinic in montreal... i'm trying to get a hold of them - i need to schedule a second appointment for the 16th to pick back up donor sperm. I called monday morning - they called me back tuesday. ARH. monday is my day AT HOME. Now i have to call from work. I go in the 'secure phone booth' yesterday -- and could hear somebody coughing - and I figured if I can hear them - they can hear me :( and frankly - i didn't want somebody to hear me say we need to schedule an appointment to pick donor sperm...! [interupted by the clinic's phone call - how weird is that?] turns out they missed the hep C testing - so they asked if i could do it next time i come in... and then she said she'd try to find a slot for me on the 16th, and she's calling me back on that... sooooooo she asked me, i didn't have to say the words, thank goodness, i'm sitting in my open area office!!!
posted by Winnifred at 10:32 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home