CD13 -- scared.
Last friday (cd10) I had an u/s at my clinic... 6 1/2 hr round trip for a 2 minute scan. and about 15 min with a nurse for a refresher on progesterone injections and such.
My lining is READY. I was so stunned the dr just said "11 - that's great - you're ready" ... me: "um... ready for...?" as in can't be the transfer, can it?! he laughed and said "you don't believe me that it's this simple this time around?" um... NO! but i'll take it.
So we started the progesterone injections on Saturday.
Transfer is Thursday. We have three embryos -- and we only just found out that they can be re-frozen if not used -- i had no clue. Having said that, I'm pretty confident we'll transfer 2 if we're blessed with 2 surving the thaw.
My dh is scared of having twins again -- although in his words: "we'll deal with it when we get there - these are the cards we were dealt..." but he would rather transfer one embryo.
I have such issue wrapping my mind around the fact that we may have embryos we wont use. or put at higher risk of not surviving say if we would thaw, freeze and try to thaw again. If you had asked me for an opinion regarding embryos and life -- before ANY of this happened -- probably even the day before the fertilization -- my answer would have been different. Now, I can't get over the fact that that's LIFE. it's OURS - my dna & my dh's dna. They're OURS. I cannot imagine "discarding" them.
I just hope that we end up with a successful healthy pregnancy of course -- but I'm scared of what the thoughts of those embryos not surviving might do to my emotional state. I'll cross there if and when we get there, i realize -- but i can't help but wonder.
Also -- I've realized that i'm terrified of all this -- i'm scared. I'm hopeful, but SCARED. I haven't slept well at all the last 2 nights -- which isn't like me -- i don't get THAT much sleep -- but when i'm sleeping i'm SLEEPING. The last 2 nights i've been awake hours on end tossing and turning thinking about thursday. Thinking about waiting for the call from the embryologist.
Scared.
My lining is READY. I was so stunned the dr just said "11 - that's great - you're ready" ... me: "um... ready for...?" as in can't be the transfer, can it?! he laughed and said "you don't believe me that it's this simple this time around?" um... NO! but i'll take it.
So we started the progesterone injections on Saturday.
Transfer is Thursday. We have three embryos -- and we only just found out that they can be re-frozen if not used -- i had no clue. Having said that, I'm pretty confident we'll transfer 2 if we're blessed with 2 surving the thaw.
My dh is scared of having twins again -- although in his words: "we'll deal with it when we get there - these are the cards we were dealt..." but he would rather transfer one embryo.
I have such issue wrapping my mind around the fact that we may have embryos we wont use. or put at higher risk of not surviving say if we would thaw, freeze and try to thaw again. If you had asked me for an opinion regarding embryos and life -- before ANY of this happened -- probably even the day before the fertilization -- my answer would have been different. Now, I can't get over the fact that that's LIFE. it's OURS - my dna & my dh's dna. They're OURS. I cannot imagine "discarding" them.
I just hope that we end up with a successful healthy pregnancy of course -- but I'm scared of what the thoughts of those embryos not surviving might do to my emotional state. I'll cross there if and when we get there, i realize -- but i can't help but wonder.
Also -- I've realized that i'm terrified of all this -- i'm scared. I'm hopeful, but SCARED. I haven't slept well at all the last 2 nights -- which isn't like me -- i don't get THAT much sleep -- but when i'm sleeping i'm SLEEPING. The last 2 nights i've been awake hours on end tossing and turning thinking about thursday. Thinking about waiting for the call from the embryologist.
Scared.
posted by Winnifred at 1:14 PM
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