Can't sleep.
Ok - obviously the "start" has marked me. I was SO restless last night. Coudn't sleep. Kept waking up...
And it begins.
I NEED TO RELAX!!!!!!!
I think I need to re-read my meditation book and start acting on it. I need to take time to count my blessings (even though i do this daily) but count the blessings and NOT think of my journey ahead. It's in the hands of one of the best clinics in the world. I'm taken care of. I have confidence in that part.
I also started reading on the subject again, even though I was instructed by health care professionals TO STOP. I'm informed. I know what I need to know (and at least 10 times more!)
I also need to concentrate on the fact that my family history suggest that we multiply like bunnies!! I come from a HUGE family... my grandparents were very fertile, on both sides - and my cousins who are having babies are VERY fertile... many "a little earlier than we thought..." babies in my family :) I need to focus my energy on THAT and realize that THAT will help us. THAT is what will make us pregnant quick. THAT is what will make IVM work. Because i'm FERTILE. Very likely VERY fertile.
And that's what i need to focus on!
And it begins.
I NEED TO RELAX!!!!!!!
I think I need to re-read my meditation book and start acting on it. I need to take time to count my blessings (even though i do this daily) but count the blessings and NOT think of my journey ahead. It's in the hands of one of the best clinics in the world. I'm taken care of. I have confidence in that part.
I also started reading on the subject again, even though I was instructed by health care professionals TO STOP. I'm informed. I know what I need to know (and at least 10 times more!)
I also need to concentrate on the fact that my family history suggest that we multiply like bunnies!! I come from a HUGE family... my grandparents were very fertile, on both sides - and my cousins who are having babies are VERY fertile... many "a little earlier than we thought..." babies in my family :) I need to focus my energy on THAT and realize that THAT will help us. THAT is what will make us pregnant quick. THAT is what will make IVM work. Because i'm FERTILE. Very likely VERY fertile.
And that's what i need to focus on!
posted by Winnifred at 10:01 AM
2 Comments:
Don't be too hard on yourself. No one expects you to treat this as a walk through the park.
No one I've heard of goes through the trials of IF with zen-like composure.
Meditation can help you function more or less normally though, I suppose.
Good luck.
You're completely right :) thank you. I think that i keep thinking that I was doing well enough - and I want that composure back... I want to stop freaking out! They say stress is a huge deal when dealing with IVF and I want to put ALL the odds on MY side!!
Today is better :)
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